If there was one thing my
first experience of Ramfest taught me, it is this: I really love metal!
Having recently rediscovered
my fondness for all things atmospheric and experimental, my iPod has of late
displayed a distressing lack of straight-up balls-to-the-wall metal. Even
Converge, probably my favourite band of the past couple of years, has had to
make way for my more chilled side. And the weeks leading up to Ramfest were
spent more on brushing up on my knowledge of Pendulum and Rise Against rather
than getting in touch with my inner-metalhead.
But as soon as Bring Me
the Horizon took the stage in Durban and “Shadow Moses” went into breakdown
mode, I was nothing short of possessed. With metal-horns raised and battling it
out at the centre of the moshpit, I very quickly realised that there is
something special about being a metalhead, something that most other people are
simply unable to understand. Having had time to sit back and really think about
it, here are my reasons why metals trumps all:
1. The adrenalin. There’s
nothing quite like the adrenalin rush of a metal song. Have all the near-death
experiences you want, I get my kicks from those riffs /m/
2. Moshing. The
sheer energy it takes to do this for an entire show has made me come to the
conclusion that I am, in fact, inhuman.
3. The emotion. Take
your hipster bullshit elsewhere; the ending of “Jane Doe” will make you feel
emotions you didn’t even know existed.
4. Opeth. Just
because.
5. Metal makes you friends. Like
this girl I met at Ramfest wearing a Converge shirt.
6. Hyperbole. Because
every new metal album released is the best album of all time.
7. Harsh vocals. “RAH
RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH RRRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!”
8. Subgenres.
Ambient Cosmic Extreme Funeral Drone Doom Metal. For the win.
9. Band names.
You have the right to be as ridiculous as possible.
10. You’re allowed to hate stuff. Anything
goes.
11. You can burn churches.
Because Varg says so... although he’s also a racist and a murderer so this
one’s dubious.
12. The look. Long
hair. Beards. ‘Nuff said.
13. Your parents worry about you. This
is funny until the exorcisms start.
So there you have it,
thirteen quality reasons to love metal. I’m sure there are many more (and
probably some good ones too) but for now you’ll just have to trust in the list. And listen to Converge.
Definitely listen to Converge.
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